I've secrets that you need to learn
Apologies, you had to use complex directions
but I'm currently avoiding arrest and detection
Expelled from the roll of clubs and societies
I've been told I lack sanity — even sobriety
So don't lie to me, if you need to leave
I've seen the finest men that need to heave
The contents of their guts across my hall way floor
With disgust, so before we take our tour
Be sure, stay close, extra tight
Geoffery — fetch our guest a pipe!
And prepare the lab you wretched tyke!
Damned monkey butler, best get this right
Special guests tonight? You're completely certain?
Then step to the right as a draw back the curtain...
Can be understood fully in my home made zoo
By brain swapping with my cranial cutter
I created my apeish butler
Like any explorer forging new boundaries
I found this astounding and took me an owl beak and wings
Grafted to a tortoise shell
And now my Owltoise is doing quite well
No, my Chimpangoat's not the prettiest of creatures
My Donkeypede has the silliest of features
My lobsterroos don't like their claws
My Batraffes do fly into doors
But until you've heard the Badgermingo sing
Or fed a tiny fish to a baby Marmoquin...
My dear sir or madam you've never lived
It's an impressive gift, so treasure this
This cage should not be open
My Camelion might be hiding loose
Oh god, so's the stripy Tigoose
And yes they're stunning
And yes they're wonderous
But they're cunning
And they might come for us
If there's rumpus, you're able to run I trust?
Geoffery - fetch me my blunderbuss
Oh no! Don't tell me you're using this mutiny?
I just wanted unity - what will you do to me?
They attached my head to the body of a chicken
BAACLUCK! So strange, so odd
In retrospect, perhaps a mistake to play god...
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