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So long to young love
I’ve anchored my heart.
Farewell to small joys
I’ve burned down the bar.
I’m changing my name
so I don’t do no harm.
Some say it’s vanity,
some say its charm.
No levels, still the same old devils.
Frightened of fear,
a servant of time.
Kidnapped the queen,
I have angered the hive.
Snuffed out the stars
with celestial winds.
Ended a cycle that started again.
I stopped going out,
they kept coming in.
Was I saving my soul or saving my skin?
No levels, still the same old devils.
Can’t hold it close, can’t let it go.
Prisons in basements in
slick model homes.
I’m just a day-tripper
on sacred terrain.
My transformation went from
mangled to tame.
I don’t feel different
but I don’t feel the same.
I’m afloat with an ear to the ground.
I built a fortress
with some books and a phrase.
I felt some heat
so I came out of the haze.
I saw the end
and I was truly afraid.
I have begged
but I’m still not allowed.
It’s a trap. Lay the bait,
catch the rat.
Flew home and left
the unknown in the lurch.
Kept finding bodies,
I called off the search.
Went to a hymn from a funeral dirge.
Church in the hospital,
dog in the church.
No levels, still the same old devils.
Shepherd me back.
This time I know I don’t know nothing,
I’m not in control.
Mindful but gutless.
Theres no need to panic.

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