The Real Pony (Eminem Parody) - text

May I have your attention please?

May I have your attention please?

Will the real pinkie pie please sit down?

I repeat...

Will the real pinkie pie PLEASE sit down?

We're gonna have a problem here.

Y'all act like you never seen an pink pony before

Jaws all on the floor like Mrs. Cake is being a whore

With me babysitting worse then before

Apples to the core? That apple core is rotten now!

EWW!

And now Twilight like: Oh no, what a catastrophe!

She didn´t use the legend of the miror pool, did she?

And then Spike said:

Nothing you bronies, spike´s a bonehead, he´s hiding under his bed...

Brony guys love pinkie pie!
Chugga chugga choooo--

"Pinkie Pie, I'm sick of her

Look at her, hoppin around shakin her you-know-what in front of you-know-who.

Yeah, but she's so fun though"

Yeah, O probly consumes too much sugar and sodium, but no worse tha what´s going on at Nickelodeon.

Sometimes, I wanna get on TV and just cut cheese

But I can´t, nor can cheese cut pinkie!

My plot is in your face

My plot is in your face

Clap youre hooves and do a little shake

And that´s the dance move, we teach the little kids

And expect them not to know what the twerking is

Of course they're gonna know friendship is magic
and everything that's tragic in the world is not run by little girls

We aint nothin but horses!

Well some of us donkeys that can't be bothered to sing on key

But if we can show a male and a female pony's marriage

Then why can't two female ponies just kiss?

All I know is Eminem will be pissed if he hears this

Sorry, those bronies can't resist!

'Cause I'm a pink pony, yes, I'm the pink pony!
all you other pink ponies are just being phonies

So won't the real pink pony please sit down! Please sit down! Please sit down! x2

Fluttershy doesn't have to be loud or annoying

But I do, mainly because I get paid to

You think I wanna be best pony?

Half of you bronies don't even follow me, let alone know me

But Pinkie Pie darling, you're just so weird!

So?

Don't you know that's why I'm feared?

My jokes go on longer than Star Swirl's beard?

Damn Dashie! 10 seconds and the sky is cleared?

Now I can properly flip off Gilda

I wanna control her with my mind like Matilda

Griffon bitch, yelling at Fluttershy

Making Andrea cry, that's why we all want you to die

Put me on blast on Discovery kids!

And show the world how the Hub wanted to get rid of us

I'm sick of you Deviantart groups, who the hell even
starts groups?

All you losers ever do is fart poop

There's hundreds of us who talk like me,

trot like me, break the fourth wall like me

Who hop like me, stop drop and clop like me

I'd rather be me than be Trixie or Flash Sentry!

Cause I'm a pink pony, yes, I'm the pink pony!
all you other pink ponies are just being phonies

So won't the real pink pony please sit down! Please sit down! Please sit down! x2

Cause I'm a pink pony, yes, I'm the pink pony!
all you other pink ponies are just being phonies

So won't the real pink pony please sit down! Please sit down! Please sit down! x2

I'm like a head trip to watch!

Weather you watch me for my personality or for my crotch

Look I'm just glad Hasbro didn't draw balls on ponies

But now all you bronies answered the call and hung it up on your wall

I just go around being all random

Cupcakes I hand 'em out to this fandom

Oops, did I say "hand", I meant hoof

Keeping in with the whole anybody/anypony spoof

It's funny, 'cause at this rate when we're canceled

Us ponies will live on through brony artist's pencils

Twilight will still be crazy, Dashie will still be lazy,

Flutter will still sniff daisies, Applejack's dog will still have rabies,

And Rarity will never say "maybe" to a date with Spike

Man take a hike to Haiti, find a new lady
maybe that dragon that fluttershy was raggin' on will
be at BronyCon

So will the real Pinkie please sit down
and if you wouldn't mind please make a frown

'Cuz only one of us can smile so bright, you lose your sight

I don't bite but if you're a cake I might!

'Cause I'm a pink pony, yes, I'm the pink pony!
all you other pink ponies are just being phonies

So won't the real pink pony please sit down! Please sit down! Please sit down! x2

'Cause I'm a pink pony, yes, I'm the pink pony!
all you other pink ponies are just being phonies

So won't the real pink pony please sit down! Please sit down! Please sit down! x2

'Cause I'm a pink pony, yes, I'm the pink pony!
all you other pink ponies are just being phonies

So won't the real pink pony please sit down! Please sit down! Please sit down! x2

'Cause I'm a pink pony, yes, I'm the pink pony!
all you other pink ponies are just being phonies

So won't the real pink pony please sit down! Please sit down! Please sit down! x2

Hee hee! Guess there's a pink pony in all of us.. Buck it. Let's all sit down.

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