This Crushing Fear - text

No more words
We’re not quite dead yet
But you’ve lost grip
On all your common sense
So I’ll sit in my room
And try to drink this pain away

Heavy thoughts
Conspire to plague my mind
And I can only try
To count the times
That I’ve been happy just to know
I’ve kept you safe

‘Cos you are the wind that whispers slowly
Drifting through my swollen lungs
You are the itch that creeps it’s way
To taste like poison on my tongue

Shadows fade but still your shiver
Filters softly down my spine
Like a villain starring in this
Mental relapse pantomime

So I’ll stay right here alone
And you’ll live your life like you’ve got
Nothing left to give

(To live this crushing fear alone)
(To live my life out here alone)

Cut the ties
I’m not justifying
Pain we’ve caused
Without empathising
Passion fled
And only anger fills its place

Speaking falsely
Just to pacify me
Written words
Must come and neutralise me
Pen and paper
And a hold on my own space

So I’ll stay right here alone
And you’ll live your life like you’ve got
Nothing left to give
And though the time will help you through
I know I’m better off than you
To live this crushing fear alone

So let’s get this story straight right now
I never wanted to be turning this pen on you
We’ll escape to better days somehow
But I’m wide awake searching in desperation

So I’ll stay right here alone
And you’ll live your life like you’ve got
Nothing left to give
And though the time will help you through
I know I’m better off than you
To live this crushing fear alone

So I’ll stay right here alone
And you’ll live your life like you’ve got
Nothing left to give
And though the time will help you through
I know I’m better off than you
To live this crushing fear alone

To live my life out here alone